So, I leave church today feeling strong, like nothing can bother me and I'm happy as a clam thinking of what I want to eat for lunch. We get home and I tell Matt that I need to go to the grocery store before the cold weather hits because we have nothing (literally) to make for dinners. I proceed to make out my list, so proud that I have thought of about 7 dinners to make (if not more after leftovers). sidenote: If you know me you know how much I HATE thinking of what to make for dinner and I really HATE going to Wal-mart during the weekend.
So, I am just walking around like I got it going on and I ask Matt if we should all go so we can get out of the house for a bit. He looks at me and says "Do you have a budget on that?" here it comes... I say "Well, what kind of budget should I have?" and I'm sure you can guess where the conversation went. The sum of these parts ends up with one of us explaining that we have no money and the other of us feeling defeated and ending up in tears. I'll let you decide which one is which. Needless to say, I gather my senses (yes, I'm the bawl baby) and decide that I will make it work with what we have and not worry about the rest. (I know this sounds like it should've been the solution all along but I'm emotional first and sensible later.)
I leave (by myself and tell Matt to let the boys play outside while the weather is nice because there is no sense in putting them through a. Walmart stress, b. my stress and c. my stress+Walmart stress = no fun Mom).
I get in the car, turn the radio on pretty loud and change the station to Christian music. (no, I don't always listen to Christian music, sometimes I need to get my groove on with rock, country and some oldies) anyway,
So, I say out loud - "God, sing to me." and the song that begins playing is about how God can move the mountains which strangely enough is exactly what our pastor's message was this morning... moving the mountain (or problem) in your life. I had a renewed energy because I knew this was no accident.
Satan is good, but God is GREAT. I don't mean that satan's nature is good (obviously). I mean he is good at what he does. It's not a coincidence that just when you feel like you can manage a situation, something happens to completely pull the rug out from under you. I've heard people ask why God let's things happen, but I don't believe that it's about Him letting things happen so much that it's about what you do with what happens. Satan will manipulate every situation in order to keep us away from our Father. He loves nothing more than when we feel so depleted and depressed that we can't think of anything else but the problem we are having.
Well, satan, you didn't win this time and it might be a small victory but I went to the store and had only $100 to spend and it has to last us longer than a week (for a family of 4) and I got almost everything we needed for $92.82. Praise God! I am still out of the rut today!
PS. I want to thank everyone for putting up with the e-mails everytime I write. I initially wanted to just let you all know what my new adventure was and now that you know I don't want you to be inundated with my writings on daily basis. So, after this one you won't have to receive them cuz I'm going to change that part (unless you just love hearing my happenings and then you can let me know and I'll keep you on the e-mail list.) You can find me on the address that comes to you on the link if you're curious as to what I'm up to and what I find in life to keep me Out of the Rut!